I plan to do this to someone.
HENDERSON, HELP ME! THE MACHINE REQUIRES CALIBRATION!
HENDERSON, TURN IT OFF!
THIS IS A PERFECT PICNIC. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I AM GOING TO KISS A HOLE RIGHT THROUGH YOUR FACE. YOU WON’T EVEN BE ABLE TO DRINK THE RIESLING BECAUSE IT WILL POUR OUT OF THE HOLE I KISSED IN YOUR FACE. THOSE PEAR AND BRIE SANDWICHES? FALLING RIGHT OUT OF YOUR FACE HOLE. THAT YOU GOT FROM ME KISSING YOU.
WHAT ABOUT THE SHERBET?
YOU BROUGHT SHERBET! AAAAAAAAAHHHH! I GUESS YOU’RE GOING TO HAVE TO SPOON IT INTO YOUR STUMP SINCE I AM GOING TO KISS YOUR WHOLE HEAD RIGHT OFF YOUR NECK!
THESE COLORS DON’T RUN, UNLESS IT’S FROM QUESTIONS ABOUT THE ROLE OF CORPORATE MONEY IN NATIONAL POLITICS OR WHY SENATORS ARE ALLOWED TO VOTE THEMSELVES EXEMPT FROM THE SAME LAWS THEY PASS FOR THE OTHER 99.9% OF THE NATION!
OTHER THAN THAT, WITH THE POSSIBLE EXCEPTION OF WHY WE CAN’T SEEM TO SEPARATE THE CHURCH FROM THE STATE DESPITE BEING FOUNDED ON A SEPARATION OF CHURCH AND STATE, PLUS ANY QUESTIONS ABOUT 9/11 AND SUBSEQUENT WARS, OR WHERE BILLIONS OF DOLLARS IN BAILOUT MONEY WENT AND WHY NOBODY WAS ARRESTED, LET ALONE JAILED FOR TANKING THE ECONOMY, THESE COLORS TOTALLY STAY PUT!
… UNLESS YOUR BUMPER STICKER WAS PRINTED IN A SWEATSHOP IN CHINA OR MALAYSIA, IN WHICH CASE THESE COLORS WILL RUN WHENEVER IT RAINS!
I JUST WANT TO KNOW HOW WE GOT TO THE POINT WHERE WHEN PEOPLE DON’T KNOW HOW TO SPELL SOMETHING THEY DON’T STOP AND THINK, “HEY, MAYBE I SHOULD TYPE THAT INTO MY CONVENIENTLY LOCATED GOOGLE SEARCH BAR OR (GOD FORBID) PICK UP A DICTIONARY,” BUT INSTEAD JUST MERRILY SMACK AWAY AT THEIR KEYBOARDS AND GO, “AH, FUCK IT. I’LL JUST WING IT.”
YOU CAN’T ‘WING’ SPELLING. YOU CAN, HOWEVER, ‘WING’ LOOKING LIKE AN ILLITERATE.
THIS HUMIDITY IS BULLSHIT.
i drop a piece of weed and it fell in a spider web and the spider was like “my nigga” and we fist pounded
The Euthanasia Coaster is a concept for a steel roller coaster designed to kill its passengers. In 2010, it was designed and made into a scale model by Julijonas Urbonas, a PhD candidate at the Royal College of Art in London. Urbonas, who has worked at an amusement park, stated that the goal of his concept roller coaster is to take lives “with elegance and euphoria”. It is a ride to the death. The seven loops or ‘inversions’ put the human body under such stress that it causes the brain to be starved of oxygen, as the heart simply cannot push blood against the enormous g-forces. Even if it kills you, it is designed to still be a fun death. An honourable thought, if rather macabre.